Only three weeks until I go!

I'm still reading "Best Nightmare on Earth" and still finding awesome quotes. I love the way the author writes. He's honest, insightful and funny. Here, he's talking about Port-au-Prince and describing the overpopulation:

"In town, the smoky air becomes greasy with sweat and flesh, a pungency beyond the mere pellmell shedding of flower scents, charcoal burning, rot and composting, sun on flesh, fiber, goods. Armpits are a metaphor elsewhere. Here in Population Explosion City, everything seems to be God's Grease, fried vapor."

His imagery makes you feel like you can imagine standing in the city, but I'm convinced that experiencing it first hand will be unlike anything else. I realize that being excited to visit a place like this may not be a common sentiment, but the author also describes the cool mountains of Kenscoff (where NPFS is located) and the beautiful trails, waterfalls and views from up in the hills. To be honest, the only part that scares is his armpit comment. To think that the smell of armpit, in August on the metro in Paris, is nothing but a metaphor compared to Haiti is unfathomable. I spent an entire month breathing through my mouth every time I stepped into that metro car and walking off covered in grease and grime. I'm not going to test the fates by saying that I don't believe it could be worse, I just can't imagine it.

I had a conference call last week with a previous volunteer and two other volunteers who will be in Haiti while I am there. I got a lot of great information, it gave me a lot to think about before I go and most of all made me incredibly excited to get to Haiti! Both times when I've been out of the country for an extended period of time, I had a great knowledge and liaison to the culture I was being immersed into. So many people who visit France think that waiters and store employees are rude. It gave me such a better experience to have a native Parisian to explain etiquette in France and the best, and sometimes only, way of getting what you want. I think that I was unconsciously trying to do the same by reading these books and following a Haitian newspaper in preparation for my trip. Haitian culture is so different from anywhere else in the world that I feel like I still have so much to learn. I've barely begun to understand the paradoxical dual belief in Christianity and voodooism. I'm still shaky on Haiti's recent political history because I always run in to, "well then there were bunch of Presidents and overthrows" but very little commentary on it. Writers always say there was instability, but never go into detail about what that means. Isn't Haiti still unstable? The government just had its first election where the previous President attended and participated in the inauguration of the next. I have yet to learn customs or traditions of Haiti, much less daily etiquette or the best ways to get what you want from people. Although I hear that finagling for permission or supplies is somewhat of an art in Haiti. Like everywhere else, I guess I'll be doing a lot of learning in the moment. Taking in new experiences, screwing up and doing better next time. That's the point of starting a new adventure right?

Today I found a book in the "Travel Essays" section of the used bookstore in downtown Campbell. It was a small section so I was surprised that there was a book about Haiti. Coincidentally, the guy who wrote it lives in San Francisco and went to Haiti after graduating from college. But, he also had a wife and two kids at that point so it's not quite a cosmic miracle. The book is called "Best Nightmare on Earth" and despite the ominous title is actually a positive, but realistic, description of Haitian society. I guess soon I'll get to be the one to judge how accurate it is. He gives amazing descriptions, especially of people and relationships- both personal and societal.


This part made me laugh and think about my trip:


"Intelligent people clung to the dream of magical intervention. Some hoped for it, some feared it, everyone believed in it. In the meantime, I imagined the international do-gooders in seersucker suits on their voyages of inspection, hovering over Haiti in multinational hot-air balloons, looking for a starving child to drop a chicken on him. Normal procedure in Haiti would be for a government official to intercept the chicken in midair and offer to sell it to the child."


The author comments a lot on the differences between the mindset of the Haitian people and the international community- particularly Americans. Growing up in the US, most of us are raised with the idea that if you want something changed, you better start planning and get to work. Entrepreneurship is valued and encouraged. So in his imagery, the Americans are there, in their hot-air balloon, not close enough to dirty their seersucker, "doing" by attempting to fix their perception of a societal problem. It's interesting that in contrast, the Haitians, who have a long history of foreign intervention and more than their fair share of natural disasters, are instead looking for religious intervention. Have the people of Haiti really given up and ready to sit and wait for a miracle? Even from the little information I gathered reading a Haitian newspaper in preparation for my trip, this doesn't seem to be the case. Haiti just elected a new President and not only did they break records with the number of voters, but they elected someone who has said that rebuilding the National Palace (which has become a symbol of the extreme division between the elite and the poor) was not of any importance to him. He has said that his number one goal is to educate the children of Haiti- for free. I guess his emphasis on a free education is a comment on how some Haitians do feel that the government will sell the chicken to the child. Obviously no singular mindset can define a nation's population, but I am very interested to hear opinions from Haitians about how the country should move forward.

     It’s funny to think about the questions that people don’t ask when they find out I’m going to Haiti. Nobody has asked what kind of money they use in Haiti. Nobody has asked if I’m going to be living in the inner city, along the beach, or up in the mountains. They don’t ask if I’ll get time to off to see the other Caribbean islands or the Dominican Republic. However, I have been asked if there are toilets in Haiti. I’ve been asked if there is running water. I’ve been asked if I am going to call my mom every night so someone knows where I am at all times (like my mom didn’t realize that was a lost cause since the 5th grade.) And mostly I’ve been asked why I would want to go for an entire year.

     If I were to go for a couple weeks or a couple months, I would never get to see the world through a Haitian’s eyes. I would be an observer, passively participating in a foreign place. In a few weeks I wouldn’t see from a new perspective. I couldn’t form a true friendship in a month. And mostly, I couldn’t make a meaningful difference in the lives of those I am going to help. In a few weeks you can give money or supplies, but what good does that do unless another person follows in your footsteps? Are you going to make sure someone comes behind you to continue lending a hand? A full year will allow me to truly experience the world from another point of view. I will get to make friends and learn about their struggles, their achievements and share my own. And hopefully, if I do my job well, I will get to make a difference in the lives of many sick Haitian people by getting them medications quickly and without hassle. I know that there are many Haitian people who could come in and set up a pharmacy, so I am going to try to use my differences to help out additionally. I am going to learn everything I can about pharmacy and medication before I go. I am going to work in another non-profit pharmacy to learn about how to manage shortages and influxes of medications. I hope that I can use my Rotary contacts to provide donated supplies. And maybe even convince friends and colleagues in medical professions to come down and volunteer.

     I’M GOING TO HAITI!!! I can’t believe it! I have wanted this for so long and now I actually get the chance to go! I got home from my night shift in the ER at 6:30am this morning, so nervous to talk to Wynn about the possibility of my volunteer trip. We hadn’t even finalized our plans to talk to this morning, but I got online in case he was on. I was so nervous because I thought that the news would be bad I had knots in my stomach and felt nauseated. Then, as the conversation started to turn positive, I started to get so excited and adrenaline was rushing through me. I was so shaky and tired and excited. He gave me an offer and then Vicky sent me an official offer a couple hours later. I can’t believe it! She gave me the names and email addresses of some other volunteers who have been to Haiti post-earthquake, so that I can talk to them about their experiences. I officially have one week to accept their offer, but as far as I’m concerned it’s a done deal! I get to go! I’m excited to hear from the previous volunteers though and listen to their experiences. They will know how I can best prepare myself and I’m definitely going to take their advice seriously.

     My position while I’m there is going to be setting up a pharmacy that supplies a cholera rehydration center, a small ER and ICU, and a malnutrition center. I also am going to be organizing the logistics of short-term volunteers who come to stay and learn about the home and hospital. I think that setting up the pharmacy will be a great thing for me to do. I will get to learn about all different kinds of medication which I currently know nothing about (time to get studying!) But it will play to what I love to do which is building something from the ground up. The pharmacy will be my project and I’ll get to see results as we build and organize this pharmacy. Obviously having a working pharmacy is incredibly important to any type of treatment facility and I think it will be great that I get to work with the three different centers. As for organizing the stays of short-term volunteers, I think that it will be so fun. I’ll constantly be getting to talk to people who are excited about coming to Haiti and learning about the NPFS home and hospital. Working on the Special Events committee for Friends of the Orphans, that is what I had been doing- getting other people excited about the homes and the work that this organization does. I’ll get to meet people from all over the world and play hostess during their stay. So awesome!